Dear Families,
Many of you have called distressed over the recent school shooting in Uvalde, Texas. Understandably distraught and overwhelmed, it is clear how heavy this tragedy has weighed on our community and how extremely difficult it has made it to reassure our children of safety and stability.
This marks the 27th school shooting in the USA since Jan. 1, 2022; and since the year 2020, firearms have been the leading cause of death for children in the country.
However, there are things we can do that have shown to decrease the risk of children dying from gun violence. For example, simple education and fire safety practices have shown to dramatically decrease firearm injury to children.
1 out of 3 homes in the USA have firearms in them
- If you have a firearm in your home, or your children visit homes with a firearm, make sure it is locked away safely. Ensure the ammunition is locked away separately.
- Make sure your children cannot access the firearm.
- Ask your children if their friend’s homes have guns in them (1 out of 3 do).
- Confirm the practice of firearm safety at the homes your child visits.
What can you do or say to your children to help them cope with news about the most recent school shootings?
- Take care of yourself. Like getting oxygen in an airplane emergency, you need to get oxygen for yourself first before you can help another. Calm yourself as best you can. Absolve yourself of blame. Reach out to loved ones to support them and get support from them, counselors and professionals.
- Reassure your children that their home, community and school is safe. Remind them of how you practice and teach gun safety and remind them how they can help keep themselves and others safe by knowing how to handle a situation where they might be in the presence of a gun.
- Listen to your children and give them unconditional love. Allow them to express anything they feel and reflect their feelings back to them to validate their feelings.
- Be receptive to any feelings your children express including, fear, anger, sadness and anxiety. Let them know it is ok to feel anything and that you will help them not to engage in any regressive behavior, that you will be a protective adult who can help them from any destructive behaviors and will be there to keep them safe.
- Empathize and sympathize. Allow your children to see how you feel. Mirror their feelings back to them.” I see you’re upset”
- Hug, provide a comfortable safe place physically emotionally. Let your children know that you have felt scared and overwhelmed when you were their age and you got through it.
- Tell the truth. Find out what they know or have heard about a dangerous situation and tell them the truth in age-appropriate words they can understand.
- Children are smart and know when they are being told half-truths or lied to.
- Don’t unnecessarily overwhelm children with watching news reports or confront upsetting images but do find out what they have heard or seen and try to explain the truth in as age-appropriate language as possible.
- Let children comfort you. Share your feelings and help each other overcome this together. Reassure your children that you will protect them and reassure them that they will get through this and be stronger and learn to protect themselves and others as they grow up.
- Get professional help if you or your children seem to be overwhelmed and not able to function normally in your day to day lives.
- Never be reluctant to ask children if they feel safe including thoughts of self-harm or suicide.
- Use the resources we have here at Newton Wellesley Family Pediatrics. Reach out to our nurses and providers for advice.
- Reach out to our embedded psychologist Dr. Charlie D. Brown, PHD available by calling our front desk.
- Reach out to local grieving resources like “The Children’s Room” 1210 Mass Avenue, Arlington, MA 1-781-641-4741
- Link to AAP advice on firearm safety - Talking With Children About Tragedies & Other News Events - HealthyChildren.org