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Pearls of wisdom on raising 3-year-olds
- Make times in your day when you give up everything to be with your child on his terms. Rituals like breakfast time, bedtime reading and bath time provide opportunities to send the message, 'I'm yours now. I miss you when I'm not.' Getting on the floor and playing with your child can help make up for lost time.
- Deserting a child who has just shown aggressive behavior is not helpful. Instead, pick her up and comfort her. Remind her how frightening it was to lose control. Tell her you'll set limits for her until she can achieve them herself. A child needs limits and nurturance. Offer the child a chance to apologize, to repair the damage and to feel forgiven.
- Mealtimes are important opportunities for a child to learn expectations. Do not force or coax your child to eat, but as soon as the child begins to tease, throw or drop food, or move around the room, her dinner is at an end. Once she's excused, don't reinforce her behavior by joking or playing with her.
- Recognize that with all the growth your child experiences at age 3, there will be periods of regression and falling apart. But when he can pull himself together, he feels an enormous sense of pride and empowerment. He's learning that what he does matters, and that the world has much to teach him.